Ask Good Questions
“He who asks questions cannot avoid the answers.”
- Cameroon Proverb
I once read a ridiculous question on Yahoo! Answers. “Can you lose your virginity if you fall? My friend and I have been debating about it because I fell yesterday and I think I lost virginity.”
A netizen replied with generosity. “Unless you’re falling into a vargina or onto a penis, no.”
There are good and bad versions of all things: good book, bad book; good movie; bad movie; and yes, good question and bad question. If you email Oprah Winfrey with the above question, I don’t think she would direct you to Yahoo! Answers. My best guess is she would tick your email and click “delete” instead.
Don’t do this to your favorite authors. They’re all busy working on something important to the world. She would only talk about the virginity thing to her daughter and make sure her daughter won’t marry a guy who asks a stupid question.
My first email to Derek went like this:
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Hi Derek,
Before asking you for a piece of advice, I want to say that I love your voice!
I ran into you when I heard the one-hour-conversation you did with Ramit Sethi talking about the story of CD Baby. It was a really interesting story you definitely need to share with the rest of the world. I listened to it again and again - at least thirty times. After repeating that many times, I already wanted to drop you a say-hello-email. But I had no idea what I wanted to talk to you at that point. So I wait...
Until recently, I found out you have a new book released!! So the first action I took, of course, was to buy your audible book!! As I am still an English learner, I bought the e-book from Amazon too. To make sure that I won't miss any message you strived to let me know. One more thing I want to highlight is that your - Hell Yeah philosophy - drove me to buy your book immediately. Normally I would read the book sample before I actually spend my hard-earned cash on certain books. But the author is Derek Sivers, I felt really comfortable with you and trusted that Anything You Want must be a great book. Hence, the first time in my e-book life, I bought a book with an exception! Anything You Want had a Hell Yeah feeling in action!
Today I had an unexpected day-off because of the typhoon. I could pause my busy life and take a step back to see what I am actually doing with it. I found I’m lost somehow. Last Tuesday was the end of probation for my new job as a copywriter in a digital marketing company, where I promote products and services for other companies. But I didn't feel happy.
So my question is: what would Derek Sivers think and do if he faces a situation like this?
I think you must have gone through a situation like this when you were 20ish, still living in Woodstock, New York producing other people's records. The financial pressure, the growing responsibilities, and you name it, etc.
Looking forward to your reply.
Have a blessed day!
- Nobody
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I was a nobody without the wisdom of Derek Sivers. This was a question I cannot answer myself. If I have the ability to answer this question, a positive impact in my life will be almost guaranteed. It’s always OK to ask for help, but make sure not to be the man who you won’t let your daughter get married with.
A day later, after asking the good question and hoping for the best to happen, I looked up to the sky. That was a cloudy day with a few rain patches. With the audacity of hope, I was not afraid of the raindrops. “What’s the worst that could happen?” I thought. Running back to the treadmill and being a hamster. So, first thing first, I was thinking about what to eat for breakfast. Taking cheese as breakfast was no better deal for a hamster. While imagining my favorite cheese and looking at the sky, I saw something abnormal happen. A cheese emerged from the shapeless cloud. It was not only in a cheese shape, but was also yellow in color! Within one day, my hero’s reply dropped from the sky!
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Hi Nobody -
Thank you! Where are you? What is your main language?
Without knowing the details of your situation, my best advice is this:
Work with the existing job, and make the best of it for now. Think of lessons you can learn in this job. Everything is practice for something else. There's something you are learning now that you will be able to use in the future.
Then... while you are doing this.... at the same time.... start doing something else on the side that is your real dream-come-true.
Maybe it's pursuing a new skill, or a new job, or starting a company, or something else. But begin it on the side. This will be your real love.
Keep improving it, keep finding ways to make it valuable enough to other people that they are happy to pay you for it.
Then eventually, if you keep improving, this side-love will make enough money for it to become your main job, and then you can quit the job you don't love.
- Derek Sivers
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After reading the email, I didn’t know concretely what the next step should be. But I felt resilient. I listened to my hero’s advice and got back to where I was: the treadmill. Making the best of it. And pursuing my dream and running on the treadmill simultaneously.
Along the way, something magical happened, I started to love my copywriter job. I thought of the lessons I learned from the job and realized everything was practice for something else. There was something I learned that could be used in the future. English? Online knowledge? Entrepreneurship? I have been learning too much in these few years. I couldn’t name them all, but they set the stage for my dream job later……
Read the next chapter: Be Patient
Or table of contents: Brick by Brick